Top Ten Tuesday: Ultimate Bookish Turn-Offs

This week’s TTT, hosted as always by The Broke and The Bookish, is the opposite of last week’s, when we talked about the factors that make us want to read a book; this week is all about the things that put us off.

Mainstream snobbery
Look, I won’t lie; I’m a book snob. Generally speaking, I am not going to read something if a) people who don’t like reading like it, b) it’s being advertised at the train station or c) you can buy it in the supermarket. I’m not proud of these things; they’re just true. So, no, I haven’t read Before I Go to Sleep, or The Da Vinci Code.

Teenage melodrama
I still read a fair bit of YA, and a decent amount of that is contemporary, but if the synopsis sounds anything like “insert girl name never dreamed of finding a boyfriend and then UNBELIEVABLY two boys fancy her at once,” it’s just a “no” from me.

Early modern period
I’m not sure if this has been a conscious choice, but I just don’t read anything set in the early modern period, so The Other Boleyn Girl and Wolf Hall have not been on my shelves and probably never will be. It’s odd, because I studied that period at A-level and enjoyed it, but I just don’t want to read about it.

Jodi Picoult
I read two Picoult books a long time ago and hated them with such a violent passion that I scared the neighbours. I don’t mind emotive books, but I don’t want to be emotionally manipulated by one.

“For fans of John Green/Rainbow Rowell”
I have read John Green books and experienced mixed feelings. I love Rainbow Rowell. But it really annoys me when novels are compared to them; it smells of a cash-in to me, like all those dystopian books that were meant to be “for fans of The Hunger Games.

PDAs on covers
I cannot abide all those awful covers with couples intwined around each other, or that just show legs; like, with a girl doing an annoying Kelly Kapowski-style foot pop (if you were a teenager in the ’90s, I know you know what I mean). Or a topless man. This rules out, as far as I can see, all romance and New Adult novels, which is fine with me.

“First in an exciting new series!” 
I am already involved in too many series, particularly for a person who can never remember what happened in the previous book (not helped when they’re released so bloody far apart). So, until I can call time on An Ember in the Ashes, Throne of Glass, Red Queen and Illuminae, I’m just not looking to get involved. It’s not you, it’s me. Okay, it’s kind of you.

Misery Memoirs
No, no, no. I will not read any of those books about someone’s horrible childhood. I sympathise with people who had a horrible childhood – really, I do – but I have no desire to read about it.

500+ pages
I do read really long books (The Sport of Kings was over 500 pages and Les Miserables is 1200 and that’s one of my favourites) but I have developed a stupid mental barrier against reading anything more than 500 pages, because it will take me more than 2 days and, for some reason, I don’t find that acceptable. It is stupid.

Middlemarch
Well, I’ve been meaning to read it for two years now and it hasn’t happened.

Do you share any of my virulent objections? Please let me know and leave your links in the comments.

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7 thoughts on “Top Ten Tuesday: Ultimate Bookish Turn-Offs

  1. Holly says:

    hahaha I laughed when I got to Middlemarch at the end– I’ve been meaning to read that novel for years as well but I just haven’t gotten around to it.
    I also agree with you about teenage melodrama and books labelled “for fans of John Green/Rainbow Rowell/etc.” When I pick out a book, I’m looking for something original and creative, NOT a copy of a book I’ve already read!
    Great list! 🙂

    Like

  2. Cholla says:

    I agree with so many of these, especially PDA on book covers. My 15-year-old daughter and I share an Amazon account so whatever books I buy… she sees. Enough said. I get enough flak about the half naked cowboy covers that have been popping up recently. I can’t imagine what she’d say about a half naked couple making out.
    Ugh, when someone thinks I’ll like this book because I liked another author. Half the time, I can’t ever see the similarities between the authors that might have drawn me there.
    Here is my Top Ten Tuesday!

    Like

  3. the (book) supplier says:

    Books one can buy in the supermarket are interesting to me from a marketing perspective. How does the grocery store, Wal-Mart or Target decide which books to stock? In the town where I teach, the only bricks and mortar place to buy new books is Wal-Mart, and the pickings are slim. Your Middlemarch is my Heart of Darkeness. I was supposed to read it at 15, tried to read it again at 30 and failed. I’ve given it up at this point. Great list.
    eli @ the (book) supplier
    My TTT

    Like

  4. vendija723 says:

    Oh God, A Child Called It is always, always super popular with my middle school students and I flat-out refuse to read it.

    Like

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